Thursday, June 23, 2011

"You didn't mention God"

(For every Friday at CPE, we bring a "journal entry" about a theological issue we're currently wrestling with.  This is mine for the week, with some links that will help with references...)

"You didn't mention God."
     - a comment on my first chapel talk

For a year I've not written the word,
baptizing a Jewish G-d in the name of
doubting what I have proclaimed.

We speak too casually of
Who is so deep and wide.
We speak too cruelly of
Who is the source of Love.
So I would not speak anymore in His name.

Who is this God of whom I dared
not speak or write?

slaughterer of Egypt's children,
raining fire on Gomorrah?

Guider of the invisible hand
leaving well-crafted watches in woods?

Distant clockmaker, great Physicist,
puller of atomic strings?

Omnipotent, omniscient, eternal,
He beyond all knowing?

Never did the gods
of white and western men
find permanent thrones
in my heart's gold chapel.

For years I supplicated
Son and Spirit alone,
denying space to the Father of the fathers,
to a Mighty Hand in the face of mighty evil,
to Exclusivity in the face of experience,
to Judgment in the face of injustice.

For years I have called upon
the Son who suffered
and the Spirit who soars,
more sure of pain and prayer
than of power.

I wonder now if
in my resistance to war and whitewash
I have been praying
to God all along.

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