Monday, October 25, 2010

Three years ago, a beautiful light in this world was destroyed.

Katherine brought light and joy to everyone she met.  I knew her only as an acquaintance, but even our short encounters were filled with her kindness and intentionality.

Katherine is now more widely known as "the Craigslist nanny," the girl who answered an ad in Minneapolis, and whose body was later found in a trunk.  The facts of her murder are gruesome and sickening.  Her murderer is now in prison, for life, with no chance of parole.

Katherine's little brother, Karl, was married this past weekend.  I know Karl also as only an acquaintance, but we have several mutual friends, so my Facebook feed has been filled with photographs and congratulations.  Yesterday I was meditating on the beauty of this:  that a month and week and days so filled with pain, death, and grief are now colored with joy and celebration.  Katherine would want it this way.

Then today, Adam (of and his wife Sarah had to see their twin baby boys born - at twenty weeks old.  They survived for an hour.

How do I force myself to care about Hebrew verb tenses and creatio ex nihilo vs. primordial soup and the meaning of "pistis" in Mark's gospel when the world is so full of absolute despair and barrenness?

I know that all I am learning now will help me to stand in the midst of darkness and nothingness.  I know this.  I do.  And I believe it.  I simply do not believe it at this present moment.

Lord have mercy.  Christ have mercy.  Lord have mercy.

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